Amazing & Funny Stuff from Pakistan

Give me a Hug on Eid Day

Pakistan In Year: 2020

Two American Executives, USA

Alex: Hi John. You didn't come to work yesterday

John: Yeah. I was at the Pakistani Embassy trying to get my visa.

Alex: Oh, really? What happened? I've heard that these days they have become very strict.John: Yeah, but I managed to get it.

Alex: How long did it take to get it stamped?

John: Man, it was a long queue. Bill Gates was waiting in front of me and they really gave him a
hard time.The poor guy even brought the property papers for his house in Seattle to show them that he will return to USA . I went there at 4:00 a.m. to get in the queue and there were tons of people ahead of me.

Alex: Really? In Pakistan, at the US Embassy it only takes an hour to get a visa for USA .

John: Yeah! But that's because no one in Pakistan would want to come to USA , except Americans who have taken Pakistani nationality and want to bring their kids here.

Alex: So, when are you leaving?

John: As soon as I get my tickets from the company in Pakistan . I'm so excited. I will be getting a chance to finally fly with the world's fastest growing airline, Pakistan International Airlines (PIA). Sort of dream come true, you know.

Alex: How long are you planning to stay in Pakistan ?

John: What do you mean 'how long'? I will try and settle in Pakistan . My company has promised me that they will process my Green Book as soon as soon as possible.

Alex: Really? Man, you're a lucky one. It's very difficult to get The Green Book in Pakistan . Last year my cousin and his family went there on a tourist visa and they're not coming back now.

John: Yeah. That's why I'm planning on marrying a Pakistani girl There and then sponsoring my parents and my brother and sister from New York to Pakistan .

Alex: What city are you going to?

John: Karachi. The company has an office in downtown Saddar. Yeah, the salary is good but the cost of living is quite high because of all the people flocking to this high-tech Mecca .

Alex: I hear the exchange rate is now $100 to a Rupee! That's just Too much. What about
Quetta and Peshawar ? What are they like?

John: No idea. But they are cheaper than Karachi , which is the world's headquarters for information technology now.

Alex: I hear the quality of life in Pakistan is incredible.

John: Yeah, man. You can buy a BMW for Rs.30 ,000, and a Mercedes for less than Rs.45,000. But my dream is to purchase a Suzuki Mehran which costs roughly Rs.90,000. But what a sweet design, great curves, and it purrs to the touch.

Alex: By the way, which company are you gonna work for?
John: Metro Milan Technologies, a pure Pakistani conglomerate specializing in embedded software.

Alex: Man, you're so lucky to work for a pure Pakistani company. They are really intelligent and unlike any American body shops that have opened their fly-by-night outfits in Pakistan . The Pakistani Companies pay you even when you're on the bench. My friend, Paul Allen, used his bench time to visit the Makran Coast, the most gorgeous resort in Pakistan, I hear

John: Yeah, man, you're right. I hope the US learns something from them and follows in their footsteps. It seems all we do is borrow more and more money from the Banks.

Alex: How are you going to cope with their language?

John: I've been learning Urdu since my school days. I always dreamed that one day I'll head for Pakistan ever since my uncle bought me that T-Shirt from Islamia College . At the Consulate they tested my proficiency in Urdu and were quite impressed by my score in TOUFL (Test of Urdu as a Foreign Language).

Alex: Boy! You're so damn lucky.

John: Yeah. I'll be travelling in the world's fastest train, Tezgam, I'll be visiting the world's largest theme park in Changa Manga, and I'll be visiting the famous Lollywood where I might meet the sons and daughters of movie legends like Nadeem, Sultan Rahi, Anjuman etc.

Alex: You know, the Pakistani President is scheduled to visit USA Next year and I hear that he may increase the number of employment visas.

John: That's very true. Last month, their Labour Minister, visited the White House and donated Rs.20,000 for the re-development of the Silicon Valley , and has promised more if we follow the models of the fast developing high-tech cities, Gujranwalla and Raiwind.Bill Gates was lucky to have a chance to meet him. Very lucky person.

Alex: Will you be calling on Peter? I hear that he has made it big there and has a beautiful house on the Lyari River in Karachi .

John: Yeah, I'll be meeting him.

Alex: Anyway, nice chatting to you, John. Good luck, you lucky guy.

John: Yeah, and the same to you,

Alex: By the way, don't ever go to the Pakistani Consulate in shalwar-kameez because they will think you're too Pakistanised and may doubt that you will ever come back, and your application will be rejected. And yes, don't forget to say to the Visa Officer politely: 'As'salam-o- Alaikum, aap kaisay hain?' It will show them you're a cultured person.

Power of Punctuation -: )

Funny & Amazing...

Funny Quotes (WIFE)

When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her. David Bissonette

After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together.
Sacha Guitry

By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one,

you'll become a philosopher.
Socrates

Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them.
Anonymous

The great question .... which I have not been able to answer ...... is,
'What does a woman want?
Dumas

I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me.
Sigmund Freud

Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays. Anonymous

'There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking.
It's called marriage.
Sam Kinison

'I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me,
and the second one didn't.'
James Holt McGavra

Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming 1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it, 2.. Whenever you're right, shut up.
Patrick Murra

The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once....
Nash

You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to.
Anonymous

My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
Henny Youngman

A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.
Rodney Dangerfield

A man inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: 'Wife wanted'. Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: 'You can have mine.'
Anonymous

First Guy (proudly): 'My wife's an angel!' Second Guy: 'You're lucky, mine's still alive.' Anonymous

SEND THIS TO ALL THE GUYS TO GIVE THEM A GOOD LAUGH ... AND TO THOSE LADIES WITH A SENSE OF HUMOR WHO CAN HANDLE IT !!!!!!!

Funny Quotes

After Marriage

Funny Pictures Pakistan

LOL

Amazing Funny!

Really Funny

Funny Quotations

If your father is a poor man, it is your fate but,
if your father-in-law is a poor man, it's your stupidity.
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I was born intelligent - education ruined me.
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A bus station is where a bus stops.
A train station is where train stops.
On my desk, I have a work station..
what more can I say..........
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If it's true that we are here to help others,
then, what exactly are the others here for?
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Since light travels faster than sound,
people appear bright until you hear them speak.
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How come "abbreviated" is such a long word ?
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Money is not everything.
There's Mastercard & Visa.
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One should love animals.
They are so tasty.
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Love thy neighbor.
But don't get caught.
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Behind every successful man, there is a woman.
And behind every unsuccessful man, there are two.
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Success is a relative term.
It brings so many relatives.
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Never put off the work till tomorrow
what you can put off today.
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Love is photogenic
It needs darkness to develop
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"Your future depends on your dreams"
So go to sleep
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There should be a better way to start a day
than waking up every morning
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"Hard work never killed anybody"
But why take the risk !
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"Work fascinates me"
I can look at it for hours !
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God made relatives;
Thank God we can choose our friends.
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When two's company, three's the result !
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A dress is like a barbed fence
It protects the premises without restricting the view
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The more you learn, the more you know,
The more you know, the more you forget
The more you forget, the less you know
So.. why learn.